Tuesday, November 28, 2006

I suspect my Foto Barrage! posts are the most insipid of all, but, uh, Barrage! incoming. But first, lest anyone think I was randomly harsh on a poor unstylish vain little Finn in my last post: I can't go into it here, but KALLE KNOWS WHAT KALLE DID. Aside from the hang of his pants and his wearing black nail polish like we're all about to watch a Nine Inch Nails concert DVD together. Awright, let's have some images.

OK, we have to allow for Swedishness here, and forgive some fashion errors (the horror of those boots with the strappy business, the Slipknot-esque camo pants), because that is a nice fourbanger. Hails.

A black metaller with a sense of humor is rare as an outgoing snow leopard, and here we've got a pair of them. So hails here too. Hails on being sublime, and that's rare thing to get hailed on.

This one's initially a tough call. Working against Jan here, we have vexsome Aryan half-dreads (held back with - can it be - a terry band?, abysmal cuff tastes, and pro wrestler facial hair. For him, we have the again sublime comic sense necessary to strike a BMetal pose next to such an outlandishly cute, tiny and Disneyesque phantasy-goat. I'm going to say yes. Finnish fashion again forgiven, Jan obtains my blessing.

My thumb turned downward without too much deliberation here. Farron Loathing (GET IT? Gag names have been more obtuse than that, I feel.) does earn some points for an attempted crossover move - having an irony/stoner/prog metal mustache while in a black metal band. Bold, it's true, but ill-chosen. I can't get behind it, or feel like riding it (GET IT?). Plus the attempted rock-sex-god position he's assumed here for his promo shot. Eek. However, his band is fucking called Lightning Swords of Death, and I wouldn't dream of impugning that. That is gooood.


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