A well-established phenomenon containing explosive erotic potential that has yet to unleash its core-melting heat: Polynesian NFL players, specifically the Tongan and Samoan contingents. No stone foxes yet (Pittsburgh's Troy Polamalu would be a tentative contender were he a little less high on Jesus), but I feel certain that the future holds dreamboats of heretofore unimagined NFL pulchritude.

(Luckily for all known Owls! readers, this will be the only post related to the onset of football season.)