A homosexual, pulling bread out of the oven, wearing a t-shirt with "Hoin' Ain't Nothin' Nice" handwritten on it: " . . . but if you try to cut it with anything but a bread knife you'll shred it. Anyway. Gimme your bread knife."

Yrstruly: "I, uh, I guess we have one, let me look around for a sec - "

Homosexual [shrilly]: "GIVE ME THE BREAD KNIFE THAT I KNOW YOU MUST HAVE BECAUSE *PEOPLE HAVE BREAD KNIVES*."